The Joke Thread

[Hirsch]

I don't get the "710" one.

But on the others. Especially the last one!!

[sacady]

It's OIL upside down.

[Hirsch]

It's OIL upside down.

Now I feel REALLY dumb!

[rpiereck]

Little Johnny hears a noise and peeps into his parents room to check it out.


He finds his mum bent over the dresser and dad going at it like crazy, his dad sees Johnny and winks at him.


Afterwards Dad goes to check on Johnny. He finds grandma bent over the dresser and Johnny going at it from behind.


His dad yells "What the hell are you doing?" Johnny winks back and replies "Not so funny when it's your mum is it?"

[SaabKen]

It's OIL upside down.

It's AWL in Texas ........

[Hirsch]

BIKER HELL

One day a biker dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in
despair, he has his first meeting with the devil...

Satan: "Why so glum?"

Biker : "What do you think? I'm in hell!"

Satan: "Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here.
You a drinking man?"

Biker : "Sure, I love to drink."

Satan: "Well, you're gonna love Mondays then.
On Mondays, that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness,
wine coolers, Tab, and Fresca. We drink 'til we throw up and then we
drink some more! And you don't have to worry about getting a hangover,
because you're dead anyway."

Biker : "Gee that sounds great!"

Satan: "You a smoker?"

Biker : "You better believe it."

Satan: "All right! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest
cigars from all over the world, and smoke our lungs out. If you get
cancer, no biggie, you're already dead, remember?"

Biker : "Wow...that's awesome!"

Satan: "I bet you like to gamble."

Biker : "Why, yes, as a matter of fact I do."

Satan: "Good,'cause Wednesdays you can gamble all you want. Craps,
blackjack, roulette, poker, slots, whatever. If you go bankrupt, it
doesn't matter, you're dead anyhow."

Biker : "Cool!"

Satan: "What about Drugs?"

Biker : "Are you kidding? Love drugs! You don't mean...?"

Satan: "That's right! Thursday is drug day.. Help yourself to a great
big bowl of crack or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine.
You can do all the drugs you want. You're dead so who cares."

Biker : "Wow! I never realized Hell was such a cool place!"

Satan: "You gay?"

Biker : "No..."

Satan: "Ooooh, Fridays are gonna be tough..."